1. A muslim person called (a) had an affair with a non-muslim girl called (b)

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Date: Tuesday, 2nd March, 2011

Category

Psychological and Social

Title

1. A muslim person called (a) had an affair with a non-muslim girl called (b)

Question

A muslim person called (a) had an affair with a non-muslim girl called (b). And this affair was last for 6 years of time.Having come to understand that he couldn’t continue the affair any longer and realised that it would never work out to lead a very healthy family life.But (b) is not a jew or a christian and prepared to convert to Islam for the sake of love.She never wanted to loose him as she loved him truely.

But (a) broke up and got married to a muslim girl called (c)and  has two children. She was aware of the affair before marriage and given (a) a chance to reform himself as she never wanted to encount problem with his x-girl friend after marriage.

Even after marriage (a) used to receive emails and text messages from his x-girl friend who was really frustrated and decided to lead a single life. (a) feeling guilty for what he had done and as it brought a misery upon her ,started to respond to her emails and shared pictures too.

Unfortunately,the wife of (a) happened to come across the emails and confronted with her husband for being not trust worthy and cheating. Now the wife is feeling so depressed and wanted an assurance from her husband that he will never do the same mistake again to have a healthy relationship.

In a situation like this,what’s the religious approach to deal the matter?

Is it wrong to break up an affair with a non-muslim after realising ?

What should the husband do to have a healthy relationship with his wife?

Can the wife ask for a devorce?

Answer

Muhtaram / Muhtaramah ,

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

Jazakialah for writing to us. Sister, I will be to the point. The brother is way out of line, deceitful, dishonest, uncaring and a philanderer. He firstly messed with a girl he knew he would never marry. Even though she was prepared to accept Islam, no matter that she was not going to do so for the right reasons, he dumped her. He married somebody else, gave her an undertaking that he would not get in touch with the previous girl and had two children with his wife. He suddenly feels “guilty” for what he did to the non-Muslim girl so he renews his relationship with her. Guilty? Guilty for what and why? I do not think that it is unfortunately for him that his wife has found out. It is most unfortunate that she married a dishonest person.

The sister must immediately ask her wali or parents get in touch with the Sharia court if she is in England. If she lives somewhere else, she should get in touch with the Imaams or Jamiat Alims. Her husband has to give her an undertaking in writing before witnesses that he will never get in touch with this girl again. Basically, he will have to swear that he will not do so. She must put her conditions down as to what course of action she wishes to put into effect if he goes back on this agreement. He cannot have it both ways. He has to make up his mind and not fool around with two women. If he cannot fear Allah Ta’ala’s wrath, he has to face the consequences here. May Allah Ta’ala guide him and pour his comfort and mercy on the sister. Please remind her that she needs to perform her 5 daily salaah on time, make lots of duas, istighfar, zikr and give sadqa. Also suggest to her to get rid of the t.v. and all other distractions from the house which take away the remembrance of Allah Ta’ala.

And Allah knows best
Darul Iftaa

Madrasah Inaa’miyya

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